It’s a little bit weird seeing everyone so busy buying items for exchange gifts and preparing for Christmas party while I am busy paying bills, thinking about what to serve on the table and buying what my children and husband needs. Well, you see, I have been a corporate slave since 2001 and my body seems to be looking for that Christmas rush. I may still have a couple of things to buy this Christmas like gifts for family, relatives and godchildren, not to mention Santa Claus’ list for Zach, (Marcus already knows about it so he just gets a gift from me) but there’s no rush for it, knowing that I have all the time in the world.

This made me realize that being a full time housewife is a lot more serious decision than I thought it would be. Being at home and not knowing when to be back in the corporate world (that is if I’ll ever be back), the world I have known for many years, is like losing that grip of who I am as a person. Or should I say who I used to be for so long. I did not realize that changing careers would be like changing personalities.

Staying at home is a lot more complicated, though compensation is beyond monetary terms. You don’t get any appraisal at the end of the year, meaning you don’t get any feedback of how you are as a mother and wife. I guess those can be realized after you see your children grow up and learn who they come to be in the future. Risky, yes, but when they start telling stories to you like a friend does to another or just kiss and hug you for no reason at all, it all becomes worth it.

I am now in the midst of thinking if I should not lose that grip of being a corporate person or finally accept that my future is geared towards serving my kids and husband’s needs full time. I don’t have any answer yet, but I know God has been leading me to where I should be. I guess it’s all a matter of patience and acceptance.

Lately I am having a change of heart. I used to think that I cannot be a full time housewife because lack of brain activity will kill me. But now, I am on the verge of resigning because of these two adorable kids waiting for me everyday as I come home from work. Maybe I just needed a break. Maybe I would just want to experience having nothing to think about but my husband and kids for a couple of months. Maybe God is telling me that my kids need my time more than the money I take home each month. I don’t know. All I know is that I would want to spend more time with my kids each day. And guess what, my husband feels the same way too… ahahah…

Last April 3 and 4, I attended this so-called refresher course in Hyperion Financial Management System. It was actually a beginner’s course for me as I do not have any background knowledge of this application system. We were asked to attend this seminar because definitely it is part of the audit universe. Testing the effectiveness of this system is critical because being employed in a business of acquiring, developing, managing and operating container ports and terminals worldwide, consolidation of financial information is vital.

The first few hours of the seminar made me realize how powerful the system is. Imagine, the unadjusted trial balance can easily be uploaded from SAP to Hyperion (that is if accounts have been matched) and the consolidated report can be generated anytime at any form management would prefer. If you would ask me why not use SAP for consolidation, the answer is simple, other subsidiaries do not have SAP. The seminar was going smoothly not until the subject-matter expert started explaining the system in detail. No problem with access, integration and other IT issues, it was the financial terms that made the blood as if drip from my nose. (nose bleed! Haha!). I was the only non-CPA in the list of attendees. This scenario reminds me again what the heck am I doing in audit? I barely passed my Accounting 1 & 2 in college. Yes I love math and I am good at it. But Accounting is something else. It is not really much on mathematics because all you have to deal with is plus/minus (debit/credit). The problem is what you put as debit may not necessarily be, given the accounting standards. I think this is the competency that I will never be (and never want to be) proficient with. The irony of it is that if I continue being an auditor, even IT auditor for that matter, I know that accounting will bug me for the rest of my life.

First training I attended this year is ‘Adding Value Using Risk-based Auditing.’ This program is awfully familiar to me as I was already trained by SGV and this has been mentioned frequently during my CIA review. So why did I take it? My boss asked me to, so what can I do?

As expected, I was bored to death as I once again encountered slides about audit standards and practice advisories (give me a break!). But thanks to most trainees who happen to be Chief Audit Executives (CAE), I just had this realization.

Four years ago I applied for an analyst position at PNOC-EDC because my batch mate in college advised me that there was an opening. After I passed the exam, I vividly remember how confused I was when the CAE’s secretary called me up to schedule an interview. At that time, who would have thought that audit department needs an engineer to fill an auditor position? But as I was assigned with diverse audit engagements which required me to meet people with varying positions from different places, observe and review unfamiliar procedures, I did not realize that 3 years of rich experience has passed. Yet questioning my audit competency never left my mind because I pursued an engineering course not accountancy. That insecurity, together with the desire to go abroad, pushed me to take the CIA exam.

A year ago, I left EDC knowing that somehow I contributed to its success of being partners with business owners. Gone are the days that auditors were viewed as policemen or ‘cops on the block.’

Now I am already a Certified Internal Auditor and planning to take the CISA (Certified Information Systems Auditor) in the near future.

So what is my realization then? Surprisingly (to me and I guess to those who I have worked with), I now know what I would want to end up in the future. I would want to be a Chief Audit Executive myself. Based on standards, CAE should report functionally to the Board of Directors specifically the Audit Committee and administratively to the CEO. Not bad for a position eh? Well, I’m gonna push my luck (I don’t want whammy!)…we’ll see.